Kids.

I don't understand them. And I probably never will.

But, I do think so much of their behavior stems from how they were raised by their parents. I mean, duh. Look at me. Why am I so bratty, even at 26? It's because I'm used to feeling entitled, and I never knew what it meant to be told "no." That's why I'm one of those people who absolutely freak the hell out when something doesn't go my way.

My friend Sandy told me yesterday while we were at Target with our other friend Chelsea, who has a 5-year-old daughter, that I'll probably never muster up the patience to ever be a proper parent.

Exactly, I told her, which is why I never, ever want kids. They're hella annoying and I just don't got the patience.

I think it has a lot to do with the way my parents raised me when I was little. As entitled and bratty as I said was at the beginning of this post, at the same time, I feared my parents, especially my dad. My dad ruled over my brother and me with the hand of fear and absolute discipline. Any time he told me no, I knew better than to cry and whine. I never interrupted my parents when they were speaking with their friends, and when my parents had guests over, I always politely said hello to them and retreated to my room to stay quiet and out of their way.

It's basic manners like that that made me a little less bratty than I probably was.

For example.

My oldest cousin from my dad's side flew in from Korea the other week to spend a month here in the States. She has two little girls with her, ages 5 and 9. Boy are they annoying together. The older one isn't that annoying but when she and her sister are together it's like you can't get a moment's peace.

First, they ask about 50 questions a second. And you can't ignore them because they'll start repeating their questions in louder voices, because they think you physically can't hear them. Oh we hear you alright, I just am ignoring you because I'm speaking with your mother about something. So please don't interrupt.

It's just so rude. I never, ever bombarded adults with hella questions because my dad raised me to not bother adults when they're in the middle of discussing something. I knew better than to interrupt adults when they were talking. That's just fucking basic manners. I don't care how old you are, your parents should teach you these things. Asking adults questions is fine I guess, but don't interrupt adults when they're discussing something.

And then, you can't just acknowledge them just to shut them up; my nieces, once they know you hear them they ask about 50 more questions that they expect a full run-down answer for each. I mean it. They don't even ask easy yes or no questions---they ask hella hard ones that you don't even know yourself or can't answer. I'm just like, shut the fuck up, I don't know! Fuck! Why don't you go look it up in that iPad of yours that you always seem to look at whenever we're at dinner?! Shit!

Then once you answer those 30 some odd questions out of the 50 the best as you can to the best of your abilities, they have about 10 more follow up questions to each of the 30 you just answered. It's a vicious cycle. You feel like Dante when he's going through the 9 circles of hell. I'm not kidding. It's never-ending, they're never satisfied with your answers, and they come back with a fucking Powerpoint spreadsheet presentation of more questions they need answered for them.

It drives you insane. You just want to get away with some peace and quiet, but it's never there.

I don't ever, ever want to be a parent. I really don't. I can't. I just don't have it in me to ever be a mom.